Merry Wives of Windsor by William Shakespeare
Act 3 - Scene 2
A street.
Mistress Page : Nay, keep your way, little gallant; you were wont to
[p]be a follower,
but now you are a leader. Whether
[p]had you rather lead mine eyes, or
eye your master's heels?
Robin : I had rather, forsooth, go before you like a man
[p]than follow him
like a dwarf.
Mistress Page : O, you are a flattering boy: now I see you'll be a courtier.
Ford : Well met, Mistress Page. Whither go you?
Mistress Page : Truly, sir, to see your wife. Is she at home?
Ford : Ay; and as idle as she may hang together, for want
[p]of company. I
think, if your husbands were dead,
[p]you two would marry.
Mistress Page : Be sure of that,--two other husbands.
Ford : Where had you this pretty weather-cock?
Mistress Page : I cannot tell what the dickens his name is my
[p]husband had him of.
What do you call your knight's
[p]name, sirrah?
Robin : Sir John Falstaff.
Ford : Sir John Falstaff!
Mistress Page : He, he; I can never hit on's name. There is such a
[p]league between
my good man and he! Is your wife at
[p]home indeed?
Ford : Indeed she is.
Mistress Page : By your leave, sir: I am sick till I see her.
Ford : Has Page any brains? hath he any eyes? hath he any
[p]thinking? Sure,
they sleep; he hath no use of them.
[p]Why, this boy will carry a
letter twenty mile, as
[p]easy as a cannon will shoot point-blank
twelve
[p]score. He pieces out his wife's inclination; he
[p]gives her
folly motion and advantage: and now she's
[p]going to my wife, and
Falstaff's boy with her. A
[p]man may hear this shower sing in the
wind. And
[p]Falstaff's boy with her! Good plots, they are
laid;
[p]and our revolted wives share damnation together.
[p]Well; I
will take him, then torture my wife, pluck
[p]the borrowed veil of
modesty from the so seeming
[p]Mistress Page, divulge Page himself for
a secure and
[p]wilful Actaeon; and to these violent proceedings
all
[p]my neighbours shall cry aim.
[p][Clock heard]
[p]The clock
gives me my cue, and my assurance bids me
[p]search: there I shall
find Falstaff: I shall be
[p]rather praised for this than mocked; for
it is as
[p]positive as the earth is firm that Falstaff is
[p]there: I
will go.
[p][Enter PAGE, SHALLOW, SLENDER, Host,]
[p]SIR HUGH EVANS,
DOCTOR CAIUS, and RUGBY]
Ford : Trust me, a good knot: I have good cheer at home;
[p]and I pray you
all go with me.
Slender : And so must I, sir: we have appointed to dine with
[p]Mistress Anne,
and I would not break with her for
[p]more money than I'll speak of.
Slender : I hope I have your good will, father Page.
Page : You have, Master Slender; I stand wholly for you:
[p]but my wife,
master doctor, is for you altogether.
Doctor Caius : Ay, be-gar; and de maid is love-a me: my nursh-a
[p]Quickly tell me so
mush.
Host : What say you to young Master Fenton? he capers, he
[p]dances, he has
eyes of youth, he writes verses, he
[p]speaks holiday, he smells April
and May: he will
[p]carry't, he will carry't; 'tis in his buttons;
he
[p]will carry't.
Page : Not by my consent, I promise you. The gentleman is
[p]of no having: he
kept company with the wild prince
[p]and Poins; he is of too high a
region; he knows too
[p]much. No, he shall not knit a knot in his
fortunes
[p]with the finger of my substance: if he take her,
[p]let
him take her simply; the wealth I have waits on
[p]my consent, and my
consent goes not that way.
Ford : I beseech you heartily, some of you go home with me
[p]to dinner:
besides your cheer, you shall have
[p]sport; I will show you a
monster. Master doctor,
[p]you shall go; so shall you, Master Page;
and you, Sir Hugh.
Doctor Caius : Go home, John Rugby; I come anon.
Host : Farewell, my hearts: I will to my honest knight
[p]Falstaff, and drink
canary with him.
Ford : [Aside] I think I shall drink in pipe wine first
[p]with him; I'll
make him dance. Will you go, gentles?
All : Have with you to see this monster.
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Next: Act 3 - Scene 3
