Much Ado about Nothing by William Shakespeare
Act 3 - Scene 5
Another room in LEONATO’S house.
Leonato : What would you with me, honest neighbour?
Dogberry : Marry, sir, I would have some confidence with you
[p]that decerns you
nearly.
Leonato : Brief, I pray you; for you see it is a busy time with me.
Dogberry : Marry, this it is, sir.
Verges : Yes, in truth it is, sir.
Leonato : What is it, my good friends?
Dogberry : Goodman Verges, sir, speaks a little off the
[p]matter: an old man,
sir, and his wits are not so
[p]blunt as, God help, I would desire
they were; but,
[p]in faith, honest as the skin between his brows.
Verges : Yes, I thank God I am as honest as any man living
[p]that is an old
man and no honester than I.
Dogberry : Comparisons are odorous: palabras, neighbour Verges.
Leonato : Neighbours, you are tedious.
Dogberry : It pleases your worship to say so, but we are the
[p]poor duke's
officers; but truly, for mine own part,
[p]if I were as tedious as a
king, I could find it in
[p]my heart to bestow it all of your
worship.
Leonato : All thy tediousness on me, ah?
Dogberry : Yea, an 'twere a thousand pound more than 'tis; for
[p]I hear as good
exclamation on your worship as of any
[p]man in the city; and though I
be but a poor man, I
[p]am glad to hear it.
Verges : And so am I.
Leonato : I would fain know what you have to say.
Verges : Marry, sir, our watch to-night, excepting your
[p]worship's presence,
ha' ta'en a couple of as arrant
[p]knaves as any in Messina.
Dogberry : A good old man, sir; he will be talking: as they
[p]say, when the age
is in, the wit is out: God help
[p]us! it is a world to see. Well
said, i' faith,
[p]neighbour Verges: well, God's a good man; an two
men
[p]ride of a horse, one must ride behind. An honest
[p]soul, i'
faith, sir; by my troth he is, as ever
[p]broke bread; but God is to
be worshipped; all men
[p]are not alike; alas, good neighbour!
Leonato : Indeed, neighbour, he comes too short of you.
Dogberry : Gifts that God gives.
Leonato : I must leave you.
Dogberry : One word, sir: our watch, sir, have indeed
[p]comprehended two
aspicious persons, and we would
[p]have them this morning examined
before your worship.
Leonato : Take their examination yourself and bring it me: I
[p]am now in great
haste, as it may appear unto you.
Dogberry : It shall be suffigance.
Leonato : Drink some wine ere you go: fare you well.
Messenger : My lord, they stay for you to give your daughter to
[p]her husband.
Leonato : I'll wait upon them: I am ready.
Dogberry : Go, good partner, go, get you to Francis Seacole;
[p]bid him bring his
pen and inkhorn to the gaol: we
[p]are now to examination these men.
Verges : And we must do it wisely.
Dogberry : We will spare for no wit, I warrant you; here's
[p]that shall drive
some of them to a non-come: only
[p]get the learned writer to set down
our
[p]excommunication and meet me at the gaol.
Previous: Act 3 - Scene 4
Next: Act 4 - Scene 1
